Keep it up Doug.

Oh wow. You sweet souls. Water is gonna reach 131 people already because of you. But in reality it's gonna be 400 in the end because I'mma match it all and then Google will as well. If you want pals to get in on the ULTIMATE BRAG and this chance to literally buy into moral superiority, let them know.

Others: “I am a rotten person.”
You: “Human beings survive better will get to have healthier families because of me.”

Put that on your next resume, whoa!

Doug! You're amazing. Thank you for this. And happy birthday to you, sir.